body dump

Before I had children, I had a flat stomach. Well, almost. I never actually had a FLAT stomach, more like a kind of little bubble let’s say. But I could suck it in really well. For ages. Until I had a beer, then I’d forget, and just flap about down there.

And I had shapely thighs. Because sausage shaped is a legitimate shape. 

And a pert bottom. It could hold up a pencil. And probably the notebook to go with it. Somewhere there was a black woman who wanted her booty back.

And in short, I had dancers legs – which is a not so subtle way of saying my calf muscles could probably crack walnuts.

I went to the gym, I worked out, I ran, I cycled and I played softball. So I was always fit. And yet… my body never managed to make it to a revered status in my mind. I never loved it.

Then I hit 40…

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Running for royalty. Sort of.

  • By Alison
  • 4 November, 2010
  • Comments Off on Running for royalty. Sort of.

When last we spoke I was training for the Royal Parks half marathon – well, the big day has come and gone. I find it hard to talk about though, hence the pregnant pause between my last entry and this one.

The bald fact of the matter is that I was beaten by both Ernie AND Bert. And an oil drum. And also The Stig.

It’s a hard truth to face – I was completely unable to overtake two men wearing fleecy head masks representing two of my favourite Sesame Street characters…

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Run until my legs fall off

Ten years ago, when I was young and fit (ten years younger at any rate) I ran 13 and a bit miles along some jolly Newcastle roads with a few other crazy people in the Great North Run, and had three distinct thoughts when I crossed the finish line.

They were – in quick succession, and this order:

  • Never again. Ever.
  • This is half way in a marathon? Never doing THAT! EVER!
  • I think I’ll train more next year.

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Aspiring to be average – a teaser

Today is a first time milestone for me. I’ve made a blog posting in a location that’s not my own blog. But listen, this is important. It’s no ordinary blog.

The Blogger Body Calendar is a collaborative project, the outcome of which is calendar for 2010 which features 12 bloggers portraying their beautiful bodies as nature intended. And we’re not talking photoshopped, retouched, anorexic models – we’re looking at real women (and man)…

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Aerobics on acid

It snowed again last night, and turned our fetid pavement slushies back into the winter wonderland that I love so much. The grimy backyard – still littered with tools and … Continue Reading →

The body is weary, but the spirit is spicy

I’ve just staggered back in from the gym, from a “Body Attack” class which was pretty much the first fitness orientated thing I’ve done since the gallbladder left the building. … Continue Reading →

Mummy wants a new tattoo

I like tattoos. I can’t make that statement without clarifying that I don’t really fancy guys covered from head to foot with tattoos. I certainly don’t like the idea of … Continue Reading →

political correctness, hospital gowns and gallstones

I think the thing that sticks in my mind most about the operation was the crazy politcal correctness moment that popped up before I went into theatre. The nurse said … Continue Reading →