Christmas fever in october?

Yep, it’s that time of year again. When all the shops start pushing the christmas agenda, while all the shoppers start decrying the anti seasonalness of it.

I was in “Game” earlier today. They’ve beefed up their staff for christmas already. They’ve placed them at roving intervals of about 6 feet, which meant that there were about 12 of them standing at uncomfortable readyness. Unfortunately for me, I was the only person in the shop. By the time I made it to the preowned DS rack (which the bastards had moved) I had been offered assistance 5 times. While I stood browsing I got another 3 offers. I kindly thanked them each and explained that I was just browsing at that point. However by number 8 I did turn around and point out that I was slightly over catered for, and that I’d now been asked by everyone in the shop. That wasn’t true however, since number 9 waddled along a few moments later (he should have taken a more active job in order to lose a few pounds to be honest).

So how mean did I feel 10 minutes later when I walked out without buying anything? Just a bit mean.

Out in the mall, the security guards were training two gorgeous black labradors to sniff complete strangers and then catch a rubber toy. The significance of that was lost on me, but I am sure it was useful to them. One lady must have had dog treats in her pocket, as the dog kept returning to her and sitting to attention in front of her with an eager look on his face. Either that or she had crack sewn into the lining of her sheepskin gilet. I walked past five times and they never came to sniff me. I feel smelly now, but that’s probably a good thing since the idea of smelling like crack or dog gibblets doesn’t really appeal.

They haven’t put the christmas decorations up yet, thank goodness. I remember that they had them up last year before it hit November. They still have a week or two in which to commit that cardinal sin, and I am sure they won’t disappoint. It’s occurred to me that maybe the reason that they do it is because by the time it gets to christmas, no-one shopping has any good humour, let alone good will – so by then no-one at all can appreciate the beauty of the purple baubles and silvery wibbly things.

I have to admit that I have now bought four christmas presents. Two are for the stockings, and one is a skateboard because Miss Trouble Pants keeps saying that she wants one. The other is a piccolo stand for me, which I am going to use at rehearsals until christmas, just not let the children see it at home. Mr Boxer Shorts knows what he wants – that’s because he wanted it for his birthday in September and didn’t get it. Did I mention that we are as poor as church mice? He wanted a running watch for several hundred pounds.

Miss Trouble Pants also wants her own digital camera. This is a tricky one, since I don’t want to get a really cheap one (none are really THAT cheap), but I can’t afford to go mad. There is no reason why a good camera won’t last her for a long time. She’s been using my old one since she was about 5. It chews through double A batteries like it’s got tapeworm, is only 3mb, so the photos are mediocre. I suggested to her that I get her a REALLY good one, and she let me share it with her, and the reply to that was withering. She wants it to be her own.

Miss Comic Relief has no idea what she wants. Other than pretty much everything in the Baker Ross catalogue. I could get her a truck load of her own A4 paper reams, and she’d be in heaven. All she wants to do is scribble and paint and draw and snip and glue. She tells me that her class are calling her an artist, which makes the mini easels that I have stashed in the loft a great idea for her. They only cost £1.99 however, and kinda look it too.

Returning to the beginning: I was at the mall to buy grey school tights, which I was completely stocked up on until Miss Comic Relief tore through the knee of 3 in quick succession and left the stockpile quite low. And it just so happened (how amazing!) that it was Clinique bonus time. So I popped into debenhams to restock my beauty products. I’ve actually been living off samples and sachets for months now, but I never buy until it’s bonus time. I have about 27 clinique mascaras. Does anyone ever buy the full size ones? They can’t possibly run out of the sample sized ones if they get the bonus.

This year’s bonus contains some purple eyeshadow (so me!), a lip gloss, “all about eyes” cream, super defence moisturiser, the mascara, and facial soap. All in a natty bag. God I love playing with it all at home! I put the all about eyes pot on top of the previous all about eyes pot, which is still more than half full. And I made my eyes all grey and smokey with hints of purple, then I layered on the mascara. Now I am going to the deli where they are going to wonder why on earth I look like a clown.


  • Jaysen says:

    Wait. Mr Boxer Shorts wants a watch for his birthday and for christmas? I think he has his priorities wrong. That or you are misreading the signs.

  • alison says:

    It’s not just any watch, it’s a super running fandango spectacular thingyamybob that takes his heart rate and tells him where the nearest toilet is since he always needs a poo while running. (Luckily for me I don’t think he’s worked out how to read beyond the snippet that gets posted up to facebook).